Grace: God, quiche for a gay fund-raiser, could you be any more stereotypical? And, by the way, tell your people to stay away from my lox.
Will: Would you look at that? One of your women just drifted over to the fireplace, which we clearly agreed was my area since the gays need soft light.
Karen: (to Elliot) This is what really bugs me about you: the way you talk. You're honest, you've got no agenda, you're not manipulative. It's like you're talkin' in code!
Grace: You are plenty gay. If you were any gayer, you'd be Elton John's fanny pack.
Will: You don't have to say that.
Grace: No, I mean it.
Will: Well, if I implied that you're anything less than a big Jew, I'm sorry.
Will: You're barely a woman. You pee standing up!
Grace: Hey! There are a lot of diseases you can get from a toilet seat!
Will: Our own?!
Jack: Once again, I find myself in the horns of a dilemma.
Will: Once again, the appropriate response seems to be: 'wear a condom.'
Jack: I'm up for the part of 'Male Corpse on Slab.'
Will: I don't know what that means, but 'wear a condom' seems like an appropriate response.
Grace: Well, you're about as gay as Tom Sellick in In and Out.
Will: I am plenty gay.
Grace: When was the last time you had same-sex sex?
Jack: Well the casting director was gorgeous and as believable as my performance was as 'male corpse on slab', there was one part of me that refused to play dead.
Karen: I see, so you would have only been five and a half feet under.
Karen (on the phone to Rosario): Hello. This is Nurse Bigrack from Dr. La-bop-duh-duhp-boop-boop's office. Got good news for ya. It's time to start your physical therapy.
Jack (describing a party he's planning): Anyway, Elliot doesn't want me to invite Karen. He doesn't like her. Can you believe it?
Will: Kids today are so weird. You know, when I was a kid, we couldn't wait to hang out with the local insensitive drunk.
Will (to Jack): Well, for what it's worth, I've seen you act, and I feel totally confident that you have the emotional range to play a dead man.
Eliott: You kinda look like the demon that guards the tomb in Tomb Raider.
Karen: Don't even try and flatter me kid!
Karen: Come on two-shoes. You've never done a bad thing in your life!
Eliott: Oh yeah? Watch this! (Drops some of Karen's books on the floor)
Karen: Pick that up!
Karen: TWO-SHOES! Haha!
Will: I'm having a party to support him.
Grace: Oh me too with her.
Will & Grace (at the same time): When's yours?Tonight. Change yours. No you change. Stop it! You stop!
Elliot: Cool, you got an X-Box.
Karen: Hey, hey, hey just becuase my husband is in jail does not mean you can talk dirty to me!
Elliot: Would you mind sometime if I came back to play with your X-Box?
Karen: Anytime kid.
Karen: Hey, would you look at that, that game is called and X-Box!
Michael Angarano (Elliot) becomes a series regular with this episode.
Karen: You don't drink, don't smoke, what do you do?
This quote from is taken from the song entitled Goody Two Shoes by Adam Ant.
Episode Title: Star-Spangeled Banter
This is a reference to the Star-Spangeled Banner.
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