It's Raw Roulette and Booker T is manning the wheel of doom.
Shawn Michaels comes to the ring and says even though he's retired it's hard to stay away. He plugs his new show, then Reverend Punk along with Monkey See and Monkey Do come to the ring. Punk says that Michaels couldn't stay away and that he's going to be leaving soon and he'll be happy when he's gone. And unlike Michaels, Punk will leave a winner and WWE Champion. Punk says that it's the fans fault because they would rather cheer Michaels then want Punk to stay around. They tease a match, but Michaels superkicks Otunga. E- Mail! You may be leaving, but Punk will still be here for three weeks and it's time for the first match and since he's in the ring, Booker spins the wheel and gets….? Mystery opponent….for all of three seconds: Kane! Sweet Chin Music to McGillicutty.
Match #1: CM Punk vs Kane. Kane wins via count out when Punk just leaves.
Match #2: The match we really voted for last week: Sin Cara vs Evan Bourne. (The match started, but they forgot to spin the wheel and once Booker shuts up, he lets Eve spin the wheel: No Count Out.) Cara pins Bourne.
Kofi Kingston wants to spin the wheel, but Fatso waddles in and spins instead. It lands on players choice, so Kofi gets to pick the match he wants. He picks the match we should have gotten last week: Vickie Guerrero banned from ringside.
Proving that they cram too many PPV in at a time, there will be no qualifying matches for Money in the Bank, instead the Raw match will have Kofi, Bourne, Rey Mysterio, Alberto Del Rio, R-Truth, Jack Swagger, Alex Riley & The Miz.
Match #3: Kofi Kingston vs Dolph Ziggler. Kingston pins Ziggler.
Booker: Blahblah blah. Dude, Maryse is there. Stare at her and shut up!!! Alberto Del Rio finally comes in to stop it and wonders why he has to face Big Show again. Del Rio wants Maryse to spin. Maryse flits with Del Rio and it works….until he sees that the wheel landed on Steel Cage.
Match #4: Steel Cage: Alberto Del Rio vs the Big Show. Del Rio wins via escape when Mark Henry comes down and rips the door off and attacks the Show. He then slams the door into the Show and breaks the cage wall.
Match #5: Kelly Kelly vs Nikkie Bella w/Brie Bella. (spin the wheel already Booker: Submission) Kelly wins.
Rey Mysterio spins the wheel and ends up on Tornado Tag Match. Then Diamond Dallas Page shows up to shill for the Best of WCW Monday Nitro DVD. Then Drew McIntyre miraculously works a Raw, for three seconds: Superkick! Michaels wants to see the DVD because he never saw any of it before, he was working those nights.
Match #6: Tornado Tag Match: The Miz & Jack Swagger vs Alex Riley & Rey Mysterio. Mysterio pins Swagger.
Shawn Michaels kills things.
Captain Conspiracy checks the wheel then spins and ends up on Tables. Truth then talks to himself and Booker flees.
Match #7: Tables: R-Truth vs John Cena. Truth wins. (Cena was trying to beat up CM Punk) After the match Reverend Punk delivers his best sermon yet. (See quotes)