Jerry "The King" Lawler
(The Nation's music plays)
J.R: Looks like The Nation is coming out.....(notices DX coming out as the Nation) No!!!!
The King: (realises the same thing) Oh my God. J.R, look at this.
J.R: (in a laughing tone) I am not believing this. (DX makes their way to the ring) Well, you gotta know your role and I think we're gonna find out what everybody's role is here, now.....
The King: Look at DX. I mean, the Nation. Look at the Crock, uh, Rock. And look at B-Lo over there. (laughs)
J.R: B-Lo. And look at that yahoo dressed up like Owen Hart.
The King: I guess they're gonna come down here and lay some smackdown.
J.R: Well I can tell you this. I know that The Rock is in Miami, at his home watching this tonight. Owen Hart is in Calgary. And Mark Henry is down in Texas.....
The King: And I bet the furniture in all 3 of their houses are flying around the room right now.....(notices the Owen Hart imposter)....look at this guy's nose.
(DX are in the ring)
J.R: Well, we have not seen. We have not seen DX all day, folks, so this is very un-characteristic for these guys.
The King: (notices the word "Mizark") What is that, Mizark??? What does that mean?
J.R: Like you would know.
The King: (laughs) Look at this, this is great. He is The Rock, look.
J.R: The part of The Rock will now be played by HHH. Look at that eyebrow.
(the audience cheer)
The King: Look at the Godfather.
"Godfather": Pimps up. Hoes down. West SIDE!!!!!!!
J.R: What's that mean?
The "Crock": You know The Crock, just came from the bathroom.....
The King: The Crock.
The "Crock":....and whoooo!!!! You should've smelt what the Rock was cooking.
(the fans, J.R and The King laugh)
The King: Look at B-Lo.
J.R: The Nation's ain't gonna like this.
The "Crock": I ain't thinking....ya should've smelt what The Rock was baking.
"B-Lo": The Rock was baking. Brother was baking. (runs to a turnbuckle and poses)
The King: Look at D-Lo, he's the man. Look at 'em shake his head. (laughs) No wait, that's B-Lo.
(B-Lo lies on the canvas while The Crock looks down on him)
The King: Uh-oh.
J.R: What's going on here now?
(The Crock takes his elbow pad off)
The King: Uh-oh, it's the People's Elbow, J.R.
J.R: Ah, the best damn elbow in the business.....according to The Rock. Look at this.
(he Crock goes for the People's Elbow. He does the hand movement, bounces off the ropes, turns around, then......)
The "Crock": (just as he was about drop the People's Elbow) As a matter of fact.......
(everyone laughs and gives The Crock a standing ovation)
J.R: The People's Elbow.
The King: And the people are standing up, look at this.
The "Crock": When it comes to The Crock and the ladies.....and The Crock hits, rock bottom. He has no choice but to lay the smackdown on himself.
"B-Lo": Ya hear that? The brother smacks himself down. (runs to a turnbuckle and poses)
The King: (laughs) Look at B-Lo.
J.R: Aw man, I.....can you imagine The Rock? He's broken every piece of furniture in his living room right now.
The King: Wait a minute, look at this guy. Is that his nose or did they park a bus on his face?
J.R: It's supposed to be Owen Hart.
"Owen": (in the exact voice as the real Owen) WELL ENOUGH IS ENOUGH, AND IT'S TIME FOR A CHANGE.
(the crowd laughs)
The King: Look at this. That is Owen Hart. Did you hear that voice?
"Owen": So what? Nobody listens to me. Nobody gives a damn what I think. And what the hell am I doing wearing this ridiculous outfit? I look like a damn road sign. (J.R and King laugh) What the hell am I, a school crossing? You know, I tried to be a tough guy....but I just couldn't grow my damn beard in. And you know what? I, am not, a nugget. I'm a black heart, damn it. A WINNER, A SOLE SURVIVOR. WHOOOOOO!!!!!
(The King laughs some more)
J.R: Well. Things are not well in Calgary tonight.
The King: That is Owen Hart.
"Owen": And if anybody smells what The Rock is cooking? It's me. Look how big my damn nose is. (The King breaks out laughing) What the hell am I? An aardvark? WHOOOOOO!!!!!
"B-Lo": What does the brother look like? An aardvark?
The King: B-Lo, look at B-Lo.
"Mizark" Henry: (in a droopy tone of voice) Hey hey hey, Rock. I don't know what you're cooking. Smells like s**t. But I'll eat some anyways. (laughs)
The "Crock": You know something, Mark Henry.....(takes shades off) Mizark Henry. I know you're the World's Strongest Man, and the Crock's got one hell of a body himself. But there's one thing the people wanna know. How do you gets your pecks to go all the way around your back like that?
J.R: Oh man!!!!!
"B-Lo": What he wants to know, is how......
Crock, Mizark and Godfather: SHUT UP!!!!!
(B-Lo goes to the corner and poses once again)
HHH: Look. Shut your mouths and know your role. Nation, it's real simple. We got two words for ya: (with the audience) SUCK IT!!!!!!!
Nielsen rating: 4.0
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