Yes, Dear

Season 4 Episode 19

The Premiere

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Aired Wednesday 8:30 PM Mar 22, 2004 on CBS

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  • Trivia

  • Quotes

    • Kevin Smith: Oh, George. I had an excellent chit-chat this morning with one of the security guards at the front gate. Smart guy. Seemed to have a lot on the ball.
      Mr. Savitsky: Yeah?
      Kevin Smith: Tall, skinny dude. Kinda looked like Ben Affleck before all the cosmetic surgery.

    • Greg: Kevin Smith. Wow. I can't believe I'm talking to you. This is quite a thrill for me. You've done so many movies that I love: Clerks, Chasing Amy, Mallrats.
      Kevin Smith: Mallrats? Dude, now I know you're kidding. Where's the camera? I'm being Punk'd, ain't I?

    • Jimmy: Uh, actually. I don't think you have time for breakfast.
      Greg: What are you talking about? I don't have to be there 'til 10:00.
      Jimmy: Yeah, you mean Greg Warner doesn't have to be there 'til 10:00. Jimmy Hughes' shift starts at 8:30.
      Greg: What?!
      Jimmy: Yeah, sorry. You should, uh, probably get a move on. You've been late to work twice already this week.

    • Greg: You want me to work as a security guard? Why don't you just get one of the other guards to cover Jimmy's shift?
      Mr. Savitsky: I could, but I'm not going to. Maybe sitting in a tiny booth breathing in car exhaust and pushing a button like an orangutan might teach you some humility. No offense, Jimmy.

    • Jimmy: I don't want to get fired.
      Greg: Jimmy, what do you think's gonna worse for you? You getting fired, or me getting fired?
      Jimmy: But I like my job.
      Greg: Let me explain something to you. When the host body dies, the parasites that feed upon it go hungry.

    • Jimmy: Look, obviously, there's been some sort of misunderstanding, but you gotta, you know, you gotta keep your emotions in check. I'm sure there's a perfectly good explanation for, for this, and when you find out what it is, it's important that you remain calm.
      Greg: What... did... you... do?
      Jimmy: Okay, okay, look, Christine and I used your badges, and we went to the premiere as you and Kim.
      Greg: What?! What?!
      Jimmy: Look, look, I'm--look, I'm sorry--I'm--I--I just thought it was a waste not to use the tickets, and so I ended up in the bathroom talking to some guy, but I didn't know he was the director! If anything, he looked like that guy with the beard from that movie, Chasing Amy.

    • Jimmy: No, no. I'm serious, man. The story is stupid, the effects are totally fake, half the camera shots you can't even tell what you're looking at. I mean, did this guy go to film school, or what?
      Kevin Smith: Well, he did, but, you know, he dropped out.
      Jimmy: Well, it shows. This is one of the worst movies I've ever seen. I think Abe Lincoln had a better time in the theater than I had tonight.

    • Jenkins: Well, you should be proud. I'm tellin' ya, they're gonna give you the Oscar for this one.
      Kevin Smith: I don't know, man. Oscars? I didn't make this movie to win awards, you know? It was never meant to be more than a simple character study that aspired—who am I kidding? It's the fat man's year!

    • Christine: Jimmy, you're eating duck pâté? Do you... know what part of the duck that comes from?
      Jimmy: Well, as long as it's not feet, beak or butt, I'm okay.

    • Christine: Have fun at the pool party.
      Kim: Thanks. What are you guys up to tonight?
      Christine: Just gonna go to dinner with some friends.
      Kim: Oh, yeah? Where you going?
      Christine: P.F. Chang's.
      Jimmy: (simultaneous) Hooters.
      Christine: P.F. Chang-Hooter's. It's, um, a new hybrid restaurant.
      Jimmy: Yeah, there's no MSG in the food, and there's no silicone in the waitresses.

    • Jimmy: Alright, now that we're going to be pretending to be Greg and Kim on Saturday night, we should probably get a little practice pretending to be them tonight.
      Christine: What, like going to bed without doing it?

    • Greg: Hey, do we have plans this Saturday?
      Kim: Uh, yeah, my friend, Tracy, is having a pool party. I was kinda hoping we could go.
      Greg: Oh, yeah? Good. I wouldn't miss it for the world.
      Kim: Really? I thought you hated my friend, Tracy.
      Greg: I do, but so does her husband, so we have a lot of things to talk about.

  • Notes

    • The fellow amigo in this week's Amigos de Garcia Productions logo is former guest star Travis Tritt.

    • The Red Nose of Courage voiceovers are uncredited.

    • Although credited, Joel Homan, Brendon Baerg and Madison and Marissa Poer do not appear in the final cut.

    • The original broadcast aired with a 5-second spot featuring Mike O'Malley promoting March Madness on CBS.

    • The tag features Kevin Smith doing his Silent Bob character from most of his movies.

    • Kevin Smith was a guest on The Late Late Show with Craig Kilborn on March 24, where a clip from this episode was shown. He did not have especially glowing things to say about Yes, Dear.

  • Allusions

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