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My Recent Reviews

 
6.0 Fair
Tales from the Crypt
Only Sin Deep
Avg Score: 8.65    Total Ratings: 115    Total Reviews: 4
Lea Thompson (who I agree with the previous review cannot act for anything) plays a conceited prostitute obsessed with her looks. One night, she murders a pimp in an alley and takes his jewlery; then, she taks the jewlery to a pawn shop. When she cannot get enough for the jewlery, the man suggests she has something better to offer than money: That is her beauty. He puts some cream on her face and makes a concrete image of her face. He tells her she has 4 months from the day to come back and get her "beauty". She just shakes off his comment and leaves with her money. She uses the money to buy some jewlery and new clothes in order to attract the attention of a wealthy man to whom she is attracted. Her plan works. They eventually marry. One day while looking in the mirror, she notices some advancing wrinkles on her face and is extremely bothered by it. Eventually, her once beautiful face begins aging rapidly, and she becomes extremely ugly and old. She goes to plastic surgeon, but he cannot do anything for her. When she goes back to her apartment, her husband walks in from his business trip and doesn't recgonize her, for she has grown so hideous. When he threatens to call the police because he thinks shes an intruder, she shoots and kills him. She goes back to the pawn shop to retrieve her beauty back only to learn she is one day too late. The pawn dealer says he will give it back to her but only for 100,000 dollars; however, the police are on the look for her and if she turns back to normal, they'll find her and arrest her for her husband's murder! She takes her concrete face and runs. She bumps into one of her old prostitute friends who also doesn't recgonize her and her concrete beauty breaks...
Report Abuse Posted Jun 28, 2007
8.5 Great
Tales from the Crypt
Split Second
Avg Score: 9.50    Total Ratings: 86    Total Reviews: 3
Users who disagree: 1
Dixon is a lumberjack who fends off a man harassing a beautiful, young barmaid named Liz Kelly. After this, he convinces her he has a place for her to stay and that he will take care of her; she falls for him instantly; however, things don't stay so great. Dixon turns from an easy-going guy to a complete jerk especially to his employees who find Liz attractive. Things start to get worse when a new guy named Ted shows up looking for work. Dixon hires him, and Liz falls finds him attractive. Ted is great at cutting trees the old fashion way---with an axe. But he will soon learn to love the chainsaw. One night, Liz seduces Ted, and they begin making love. Dixon walks in and catches them. He whacks Ted in the side of the head with an axe causing him to go blind. A couple of Dixon's workers however have big plans for Ted. They tell him he can help them win a wood-sawing contest. Ted wonders how since he is blind. As a secret machination for revenge against Dixon and Liz, the guys put them inside two enormous logs and let Ted saw away for practice, while they guide him!
Report Abuse Posted Jun 26, 2007
7.0 Good
Tales from the Crypt
Dead Right
Avg Score: 8.83    Total Ratings: 98    Total Reviews: 1
Demi Moore plays a gold digger named Cathy. A fortune teller informs her that she will marry a man who will inherit a great deal of money. The fortune teller is right...to an extent. While waitressing one night, Cathy meets Charlie Marno who is a fat, disgusting slob. Cathy goes back to the fortune teller and complains to her that this cannot be the man she marries who will inherit the money, but the fortune teller says it is. Cathy ends up marrying Charlie very reluctantly however. Cathy is miserable with him. She hates how he is so obese and smelly. One day while shopping, Cathy is informed she is the millionth customer, and she has won a million dollars! Cathy goes to tell Charlie she doesn't need him anymore because she has money now. The money she has been wanting. Charlie doesn't take to this very likely, and he assumes that if he can't have her, no one can. He stabs her to death; thus, inheriting her money. Guess the fortune teller was right all along. Charlie is sentenced to death.
Report Abuse Posted Jun 24, 2007
7.0 Good
Tales from the Crypt
The Man Who Was Death
Avg Score: 8.09    Total Ratings: 117    Total Reviews: 5
Niles Talbot (William Sandler) is an excutioner for a prison. He really enjoys his work but perhaps a little too much. One day, he is laid off because the state has done away with the death penalty; therefore, his job is no longer required. Angry and out on his luck, Niles goes around killing people who have done wrong. He shows up at their trials and if they are found innocent, he electricutes them himself! Niles is caught one night at a strip club about to electricute a stripper, and the police arrest him for the previous murders. Fate has a crazy,ironic twist! The state has just recently re-instated the death penalty. What a shock, eh? Especially to Niles who ends up receiving the "full effects!"
Report Abuse Posted Jun 24, 2007
6.5 Fair
Tales from the Crypt
Surprise Party
Avg Score: 7.78    Total Ratings: 33    Total Reviews: 1
Ray is a young, greedy man. His father is on the verge of dying, and Ray cannot get his father's old house and land because his father is planning to cut him out of the will. Ray will soon learn why. His father tries to explain to him theres nothing in that old house but his "memories". Ray not wise enough to heed an apparent warning that there is a negativity about the house kills his father, so he can get the house. Ray arrives at the house which is burned pretty badly from a fire 20 years earlier. When Ray walks inside, he discovers there is a party going on. A very weird party. People are dressed like it's the 70's again and using 70's like slang terms. At first, Ray is tempted to call the police, but he doesn't after he hooks up with a beautiful blonde. He and the blonde go upstairs and start making out; then, her jealous boyfriend busts in and starts a fight with Ray. Ray ends up killing both of them. He then begins pouring gaosline everywhere in an intent to burn the place again to destory all evidence. When he gets downstairs, he sees the other guests and the girl and her boyfriend but in a different way this time. They are all burned up and rotted. It turns out the house is haunted, and they are the ghosts of the people his dad had killed in a fire 20 years ago! They take their revenge out on him.
Report Abuse Posted Jun 21, 2007

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tricdadec
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