Max and Caroline's Current Total: $865.00
Caroline: How would you like it if I told your mother on the other side of that door, how you boys were in here disrespecting us?
Shmuley: How's you gonna say anything with your mouth full!?
Shmuley: So lets get to it. How much of my Mitzah money it gonna take for you to pop that top, and serve me up some super fine ta-ta's!?
Max: Dude, there's not enough money in the... (pulls out roll of cash) How much are we talking?
Shmuley: Yo, yo, yo, what up cupcake bitches!?
David: I'm fixin' to marry me a be-yotch who cooks like this, son.
Caroline: Uh, I don't know what's going on, but I'm pretty sure boys and girls are suppose to be socializing, right?
Shmuley: Damn sweetness, your lips are moving, but your ass is going all the talking.
Max: Uh, is that Yiddish?
Max: Stop it now, this is like when you tell Earl your practically black!
Earl: Who is that?
Max: That's Sophie's new boyfriend.
Earl: I see, and where's his boyfriend?
Caroline: That's it! Listen, hit me with one more dead president, and you'll be 6 feet under with Biggie and Tupac! You understand me Jew-tang clan?
Shmuley: Skinny bitch came to play!
Esther: Not Kosher! Spit it out Ma! Spit it out.
Hinda: (mouth full of the non-kosher cupcakes) Just a minute, it tastes so good!
Shmuley: Damn boo, I stopped listening after you said freshly waxed.
Caroline: Sorry, I didn't know it was an Orthodox neighborhood. You know what we can just tie our coats around our waists. (Caroline and Max begin to take their coats off)
Esther: Oh, look at the breasts on this one!
Max: Oh, on or off, make up your mind!
Esther: No, bubula, I'm just saying, with those big breasts and that gorgeous hair, it's like looking in a mirror.
Caroline: I guess you were wrong Max, you and I do have family. Each other.
Max: We're not family until we have to testify against each other in a manslaughter trial.
Caroline: Did you wanna order something or wait for your boyfriend?
Sophie: Oh, see this is sad story. Uh, he broke off with me to date other woman... and she had penis. (Caroline shocked) I can't compete with that!
Original International Air Dates:
Canada: February 20, 2012 on Citytv
United Kingdom: August 9, 2012 on E4/E4 HD
Turkey: May 28, 2013 on CNBC-e
Caroline: You hear my Jew-Tang Clan?
This is a play on the hit 90s hip-hop group, Wu-Tang Clan.