Codex: You know when rabbits or squirrels or other prey-like animals are in danger, and they freeze but inside you know they're totally freaked out, ready to dart at any moment or their little hearts will self-implode? That's what I was feeling when I realized that I was the only one left in that fight! I mean, how could life let that happen to me? Please, life! Don't do me any favors! I don't want to ever be the key to anything! (nibbles on a giant cracker)
(Cyd opens her eyes and looks around, finding herself alone in a bright white space sitting in front of a computer. On the monitor is her game avatar, Codex.)
Codex: Cyd Sherman! What is your problem?!
Cyd: Other than talking to my own face?! Oh man. I've lost it. Thank goodness I don't have any pets to leave behind.
Codex: You're moving me like a total spazz! Stop playing me like I'm you!
Cyd: I am you!
Codex: Uhm... You wish. Tell me: Who am I?
Cyd: My fairy god-self?
Codex: I'm who you are in-game, who you want to be. Confident, in-charge, naturally wavy hair. (runs fingers through her hair) You're playing me like I'm Cyd! Twitchy, self-conscious, with the occasional cycle-linked pimple!
Cyd: Hey, that has nothing to do with gaming!
Codex: Just relax and be me for a minute. Reality is kicking your ass right now.
Cyd: Ok. Be Codex. I can do that. I guess...
Codex: Oh, and don't count on this ever happening again. I kinda glossed over it, but... (whispering) You're pretty close to insanity right now.
Clara: I can't believe you're making me quit after this! Why do you hate the game so much?!
George: I don't hate the game! I do take offense to you kissing another man!
Clara: That?! You dredge up the oldest things!
George: When are you gonna grow up? We have three children now! Why do I feel like sometimes it's four?
Clara: Maybe because I'm pregnant!
George: You're what?!
Riley: Zaboo! My toes are still unstimulated!
Zaboo: No, Riley! Look, you got me killed and now the Guild's gonna lose!
Codex: Thanks, Zaboo!
Riley: (to Zaboo) Oh, raising your voice to me? You just earned yourself a night locked in the clothes dryer!
Zaboo: Been there, not doing it again. I'm gonna be a man now and do what I should have done a long time ago.
(Zaboo pulls out his cellphone, types a message, and closes it)
Zaboo: Check my tweet.
(Riley's cellphone rings in notification, she checks it)
Riley: You're breaking up with me?!
Codex: Guys! Make important life decisions later!
User Score: 357
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