The Onion

Season 201309 Episode 0906

Nation Throws Giant Temper Tantrum Upon Learning Syria Is Complex, Nuanced Issue

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Episode Summary

A jellyfish falls short of its dream to kill Diana Nyad, a study shows the average person becomes an unhinged psychotic when behind closed doors, and Bruce Springsteen is on the fence about playing Bashar al-Assad’s birthday gig.

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